Can You Write Your Own Obituary?

[Colonel]

I'd like to write mine ahead of time, but I'm not sure what the rules are. I'd
like something short and sweet - nothing long-winded, that drags on endlessly.

So, here's mine. What's yours?

-- cut --

A long way from normal, but a good stick. Hung like a horse.

[Liquid_Charlie]

Being hung like a horse could be dangerous in aerobatics - inverted flight it might break loose and hit you in the big head -

[Chuck Ellsworth]

I'm only hung like a pony, but I get women wet by licking my eyebrows.

[Colonel]

Ok, here's another try:

-- cut --

No one ever understood a word he said, but he could fly the snot out
of an airplane. He spent most of his money on airplanes, women,
motorcycles, guns and dogs. The rest he wasted.

-- cut --

Too derivative?

[JW Scud]

He always wanted to be a TC inspector but they wouldn't accept his point of view even if he interpreted the regs better.

[anofly]

You need several.
one for old age
one for if it happens on your bike
one for if it happens flying
two for if it is a firearm (yours or someone elses)

[Colonel]

I guess I should write one for Coronavirus, because it's now the leading cause of death worldwide?

[anofly]

no, i think it was heart disease in usa, and they are hurrying!to open the restaurants....coronavirus may have taken over but it will pass and things will get back to normal...